


The Secrets We Keep

by sapphicsantana



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Character Turned Into Vampire, Endgame Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Established Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, F/F, F/M, Human/Vampire Relationship, Kara Danvers Needs a Hug, Kara Danvers Tells Lena Luthor About Being Supergirl, Lena Luthor Doesn't Know Kara Danvers is Supergirl, Lena Luthor Finds Out Kara Danvers is Supergirl, Minor Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Minor Lena Luthor/James "Jimmy" Olsen, Protective Lena Luthor, SuperCorp, Vampire Kara Danvers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-14 18:22:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29300352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sapphicsantana/pseuds/sapphicsantana
Summary: You know the feeling when your entire life is flipped around by your crazed aunt right before she gets killed by your own sister? You don't? Well, Kara does.
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Kara Danvers & Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Lena Luthor/James "Jimmy" Olsen
Comments: 7
Kudos: 46





	1. That Damned Luthor

**Author's Note:**

> Just some basic knowledge before you start; the timeline isn't the same as the show, like at all, and updates will be slow. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy :)

Kara sighed and leaned against the round desk in the center of the computer layout. Her head was light and her stomach was nearly empty. The DEO was working her to the bone. It wasn’t completely their fault, they didn’t purposely let aliens out to cause havoc, but a lot of them could’ve been handled by the DEO alone. Of course, though the organization could’ve handled themselves, they utilized the alien since she was there, the thought of her energy, or soon-to-be lack of, never crossing their mind. 

After working with the DEO for the first month, Kara realized that because she was an alien she’d be worked harder than her coworkers. Don’t get it twisted, she didn’t mind for the most part but her new ‘diet’ spun that mentality out of control. The piles of work kept her busy and her mind off of things prior to being turned, but after all the job did was keep her mind on the thing she wanted to avoid the most- her hunger. 

Kara didn’t know much else about vampirism, except the stuff she saw on TV (which was mostly false), but she learned more as the month progressed. She learned that emotions were amplified to the point where she wanted to punch someone into space for looking at her wrong, but the DEO, and anyone that knew what happened to her aunt, didn’t suspect anything out of the ordinary. She had lost her aunt two days after she was turned, so her easy irritability was pinned on her loss, which was partially true. 

The heightened emotions also caused Kara to distance herself from Lena, which was the last thing she wanted. Lena was the alien’s best friend before her crush, but the thought of losing her was terrifying and she knew that was a possibility. She was an alien with vampire blood pumping through her veins for Rao’s sake, what rational human  _ wouldn’t  _ be scared of that. Although, Kara knew, deep down, Lena would never judge her for being, what humans referred to as, pansexual, she was still scared of ever discussing the topic. Hell, she was scared to tell her sister, who was literally dating a woman, that she was queer. Her mind was always her worst enemy, after all. 

“You know,” Alex started, causing Kara to look up and push her racing thoughts to the side, “Lena misses you.” Kara raised an eyebrow. 

“Yeah?” the blonde replied. 

“She sends me texts asking how you’re doing from time to time, so I know nothing happened between you two,” Alex explained softly. Kara knew there was more since her sister was talking like she was easing into a hard topic or a harsh statement. “I don’t get why you’re not talking to her as much, she’s good for you.” 

“Yeah, she is,” Kara sighed, “maybe a little too good.” 

It was ominous and vague, as the alien intended it to be, she didn’t want Alex to understand but she wanted to answer. Since the older Danvers had no read on her sister, she didn’t ask for more information. If Kara wanted to tell Alex what was going on between the two, she would’ve and Alex knew that, so she kept quiet and nodded in understanding. 

“You should talk to her, though,” Alex moved from next to Kara and stood in front of her in order to look at the alien as she spoke, “you’d both benefit. I can tell you miss her, and I know she misses you.” 

Kara clenched her jaw in order to keep herself from talking, she knew it would be harsh and rude due to the unfed bloodlust inside her. She could see herself essentially reminding Alex of her distr for the brunette because of her family name, but it’d be harsh. Instead, she sucked in some air and blinked, allowing herself to gain control again. 

“I thought you hated her,” Kara said calmly. 

“Christ, Kara, I don’t  _ hate  _ her, I’m just skeptical,” Alex ran a hand through her hair while she spoke. “She’s-“

“A Luthor,” Kara rolled her eyes and sighed before continuing. “Yes, Alex, I know. You need to be less judgemental, Lena is a great person and wants to make a difference in the world, just like us.”

“Lex wanted to change the world, too,” Alex retorted. “As much as you don’t want to admit it, the two grew up together. They could share the same views when it comes to aliens, it’s not that far fetched of a thought.” 

“She’s not like that,” Kara grumbled. 

“I’m just saying-“

“Maybe you should stop ‘saying’ things, then,” Kara muttered. “You don’t know Lena and you won’t even make an effort to get to know her because of her name.”

“I’m just trying to be careful,” Alex said slowly, understanding that Kara’s frustration was rising. 

“You’re being contradictory,” Kara huffed. “You can’t tell me to go talk to her, then tell me to be careful around her. Make it make sense.”

“I’m telling Kara Danvers to talk to her friend and Supergirl to be careful.” 

Kara wanted to say that she questioned whether there was a difference those days. The only thing that separated the two was a feeling of normalcy, which she no longer had. Working at CatCo made her feel like a human, but since she was turned it was all but normal. The amount of people in the building was insane and extremely hard to work with for the alien during the first few days. It got a little easier within a week, but Kara still struggled a month later, which was reasonable because she had no guidance. 

A beat passed before Kara sighed. She understood that Alex just wanted to keep her safe, but she found her sister’s ways obnoxious and somewhat cruel. Kara had been through so much and had seen so much bad, yet she was much more open minded than Alex. 

“I think we’re good here,” Alex said after Kara yawned. “Go home, get some rest, you’ve done plenty for this city tonight.”

Kara nodded. If you had told her the same thing a little more than a month prior she would’ve fought to stay with the desire to help people, but she was tired, hungry, and more irritable than usual due to her unique circumstances. 

Alex hugged Kara and mumbled an ‘I love you’ into her ear before the alien flew out of the windows that were able to open when they detected someone trying to use them as an entrance or exit. 

Kara always flew to different places while she ‘fed’ in order to allow the irregularity of bite marks on people to fade away from the gossip since she needed so much blood (more blood equals more people). She hypothesized that she needed more blood than a vampire who was human at birth, if they existed, like she needed more food than the normal human in order to keep her energy at a sufficient level. Of course, the theory couldn’t be tested since she didn’t have anyone to compare to, not that she would want to test it. The tests would require talking about her ‘condition’, which she wouldn’t want to do,  _ especially  _ with a stranger. 

That night, she flew all the way to South Dakota. There was no specific part she wanted to choose, Kara didn’t know much about the state. She just chose the first forest she saw as she flew through the air before diving down to search the forest for campers. It didn’t take long to find some, there was a seeming popular campsite a few hundred feet from where she landed. Kara decided to go for a tent that held two people, most likely a couple, because there was more than one. Plus, if the two found the marks, it’d be less suspicious because they’re together and in a forest. Kara hoped they would assume it was just a rodent, or another animal. 

Kara floated a few inches from the ground to avoid making noise. She felt like a stalker, but what else was she supposed to do? She needed the blood to survive, her options were scarce. As she inched closer to the tent, the sound of hearts beating and steady breathing filled her ears. It made her uneasy, she was essentially a predator and these innocent people were the prey. In order to get Kara to calm down, she had to repeat “there’s no other choice, I have to do this” over and over in her head, like a mantra. She needed a calm mind in order to keep the unsuspecting people alive. 

Kara slowly unzipped the tent as soon as she was close enough before ducking to fly in. The two were deep in sleep, Kara could tell by their breathing patterns. It was perfect in the eyes of her predatory side, but disheartening in the eyes of her compassionate side.  _ This has to happen, I need to do this, _ she thought to herself.

Kara quietly landed in front of a girl, roughly 5’3 with light brown hair and clear skin. If the alien had to guess, she would say the woman was roughly twenty three. She took a deep, but quiet, breath before crouching down and gently resting her cold hand on the left side of the girl’s neck in order to lift it ever so slightly. She was careful not to be too rough, the last thing she needed was for the brunette to wake up and scream. Kara swallowed before leaning towards the left side of the woman’s neck in order to bite it. She carefully bit down, moving her hand in little patterns to smooth the sleeping girl’s nerves because of the pain that would shoot through the girl. Luckily, the woman stayed asleep, but stirred a little which caused Kara’s pulse to quicken. 

After hearing the brunette’s heart make the slightest change, Kara had to practically tear herself off. The alien felt as if ecstasy pumped through her veins as soon as the blood hit her tongue. She didn’t understand how something so horrific could make her feel so good. She then wiped the blood from her face and licked her teeth so there was no excess blood after shuddering slightly because of the gross nature of the act. After she was completely sure there was no blood left in, or on, her mouth to avoid cross contamination between the couple before proceeding to do the same thing with the boyfriend as she did with the girlfriend. 

He was around 5’9 with tan skin and blonde hair, probably around twenty five. The man was also in a deep sleep, he was snoring lightly and breathing steadily, so Kara knew it was okay to continue. The process was practically the same as it was with the girl, but the man didn’t stir at all, probably because he was in a deeper sleep. 

Despite it being disgusting, Kara had to repeat the process multiple times throughout the city not too far from the forest in order for it to last more than a few days (she couldn’t target the people at the campsite because of the suspicion that’d be raised). She felt strong physically, but was mentally tired like she always was after ‘feeding’, so she flew back to National City and went straight for her apartment. She sighed with relief on her mind as the familiar scent of her home filled her nose. It was the simple things that kept her from losing her mind. 

Using her superspeed, Kara changed into some joggers and a simple, black tee after taking a quick shower before picking up her phone, which she left on the countertop of her kitchen, and opened the app that held her messages. She clicked on Lena’s face and a bunch of their old messages flooded her screen. Kara smiled as she scrolled up and read through some of them. Damnit, she really did miss her. The alien decided that Alex was right, she should talk to the CEO, it wasn’t fair to completely ghost her for no reason- well, there were reasons (there were four in her mouth for Rao’s sake), but Lena didn’t know that. 

Kara’s mind began to race as she thought about the fact that Lena was probably blaming herself when she did nothing wrong (except be perfect and allow Kara to fall for her). The blonde quickly, and nervously, typed out a message-

**Lena, hey! Sorry for ghosting, it totally wasn’t your fault, just some personal stuff, I miss you**

_ Deleted- too desperate. _

**Hey, Lena! This is Kara and I just wanted to say sorry for ignoring you.**

_ Deleted- she knows it’s you, that’s how phones work.  _

**Do you wanna get lunch? It’s been a while and I miss you.**

_ Deleted- a bit too forward.  _

**Lena, hi, sorry I’ve been distant, just some personal stuff. Lunch tomorrow?**

_ Deleted- too dismissive.  _

**Can I come to L-Corp for lunch tomorrow? I’ll bring food and answers**

_ Sent.  _

Kara was filled with regret as soon as she heard her phone chimed, notifying her that the message was sent. She wanted to redo it over and over again until her fingers were sore, or the message was perfect. She began to overthink the text. 

_ Was it too straightforward? Too demanding? Too rude? I should’ve added a smiley face or some sort of emoji to let her know I wasn’t mad.  _

_ Fuck.  _

“Fuck!” Kara shouted while moving her hands to cover her ears as if it would stop her thoughts. 

Along with every other emotion, Kara’s anxiety increased, which made her overthink every little thing 

Her phone chimed once more, this time it was a deeper and longer noise because it was meant to signal a text received, rather than sent. 

**Lena: You’re always welcomed at L-Corp, Kara**

Kara smiled at her phone. It was a sad smile, of course, how could it not be? The CEO was so understanding and caring despite Kara being—for a lack of a better term—an asshole. The alien didn’t understand what she did to deserve someone like Lena. 

*

Kara Danvers was a private person in the sense that she didn’t talk much of her past, Lena knew that. But Lena also knew that Kara wasn’t closed off, nor was she distant, so when she started acting like that to Lena, the CEO was naturally confused. She began questioning what went wrong and what she did because of the unlikely treatment from Kara. She analyzed their, at the time, recent encounters in her head before coming to the conclusion that nothing was out of the ordinary. Lena had done nothing and she knew that. 

Unlike Kara, Lena didn’t tend to overthink conversations and tread on what she could’ve done differently. It was probably her strategic thinking, but the fact she didn’t have the weight of a whole city’s population on her shoulders had, at least, a pinch of fault for the difference. 

Despite the distance Kara put between Lena and herself, the brunette couldn’t help but smile when she got the text requesting lunch with each other. Over the course of their friendship, the CEO came to the conclusion that Kara Danvers was the most charming person that Lena had ever met. She was a kind, passionate, and empathetic dork that everyone, in Lena’s opinion, would love if they got the chance to know her, especially if they got as close to the blonde and Lena was. She didn’t think anyone was capable of disliking Kara. 

It was about 10:30 at night when Lena replied to Kara. The CEO was still at the office, finishing up one last report, but she had sent her assistant, Jess, home so she wasn’t able to just press a button and talk. Instead, Lena decided to send a quick text instructing Jess to cancel any meetings or visits that took place during, what she considered, lunch time (11:00 am to 2:30 pm). Somewhat surprisingly, Jess replied mere seconds after the text was sent, confirming that it would be done as soon as she got to work the following morning. 

Lena was suddenly hit with the feeling impatience and anticipation for the following lunch. It was a rare feeling since her life was a ‘rinse and repeat’ cycle, but she understood why it was occurring. She was excited to see Kara. To the majority of others, it would probably seem stupid to be restless over seeing a friend, but it was Kara—her hero. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewrote the ‘feeding’ scene, so if you’re rereading this, for some treason, it’s probably different.


	2. Lunch with a Liar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara had lunch with Lena

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, but here’s an update :)

Kara smiled at the waiter when she handed the blonde food while thanking her for the meal. The blonde was in a hurry, not because she was busy, or anything, but because she knew Lena liked having warm meals compared to cold. Whenever the two would go out to eat together, Kara observed that Lena would barely order cold food and she’d always pick soup over salad for an appetizer at Olive Garden and Noonans. 

Or maybe, Kara was just over analyzing Lena.

Yeah, that was probably the case. She had the tendency to do that—to over analyze things. 

That was one of the good things about being an alien—the ability to get across town in the matter of seconds—but there were days where Kara wished she was normal. Of course she loved saving people as Supergirl, but  _ Rao,  _ did she envy humans. The ability to get angry without burning through someone with heat vision. The ability to view blood without feeling a sick and burning hunger in their stomach—without the aching feeling in your canines— _ begging  _ for a taste. Just a taste—a drop, even. 

It was petty, Kara knew that, but how could she not be jealous? 

Kara was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t even realize that she was walking towards Jess, Lena’s secretary. The secretary smiled at the blonde before turning her head back to the computer she was working on. Kara couldn’t help but smile back. Jess was always so kind to the blonde, which caused them to be friendly with each other, they’d make small talk and complement each other from time to time. But, calling them friends would be a stretch. Acquaintances with a mutual friend—Lena—would be best to describe the two. 

“It’s been a minute, Kara,” Jess said as she looked away from the computer she was typing away on. “Ms. Luthor’s ready for you whenever.” 

“Thank you, Jess,” Kara replied, sending another smile Jess’ way. 

Kara walked towards one of the many the elevators that led to the top floor, where Lena worked. She saw a few familiar faces as she stepped into the box, none that she could name, just a few that she’d seen at L-Corp before. When the door closed, it was just her in the elevator. It was a relatively slow day, Kara observed. It wasn’t that Lena had people lining up to talk about her and L-Corp, but rather that the company had plentiful workers and security, but that day the number dropped and it wasn’t nearly as busy. 

As soon as the elevator dinged and the door opened Kara stepped out, not caring to make sure she was on the right floor. The path was muscle memory, so if she did get the wrong floor, she’d know right away. The floor was the right one that day, but sometimes she’d press the wrong button for fifteenth floor and have to backtrack, which sometimes would cost her five minutes, or more, since the elevators were often busy and in use. 

Kara always admired the modern design of the building when she walked to Lena’s office. It was light and welcoming, the opposite of Lena, essentially. The CEO tended to wear dark clothes—navy blue, blood red, and black were her most prominent colors of clothing. Kara enjoyed the clothes Lena wore. The brunette was also closed off and didn’t have many friends, which was understandable. If Kara had a psycho brother that everyone compared her to, would she be an open book? Probably not- well, she wasn’t open to begin with, but if she were in Lena’s shoes it’d be far worse. 

As Kara approached the office she could hear Lena’s voice become more and more clear as it became louder and the muffle that came from the closed doors lessened. She did her best to shut out the conversation, but she still managed to pick out a few bits. It sounded like Lena was planning to go out to dinner with someone. Kara had no idea what the context of the get together was, it could’ve been a business partner on the other end of that phone, but she couldn’t help but assume it was a date. It made her blood boil, which wasn’t fair and she knew it. Lena wasn’t hers and it ate her up inside to think she allowed the (potential) date upset her. 

Not allowing her mind to torture her anymore, she knocked on the door. 

“Hey, I gotta go… Yeah, I’ll call you later… Okay… See you then… Bye,” Kara heard through the door. 

Footsteps followed the voice, but there was no crinkle of a chair, which meant Lena was standing. She was stressed. Kara could hear it in her voice, but the fact Lena was standing during the call confirmed it. Over the months of friendship between the two, the blonde started to understand Lena’s emotions without saying a word. That was something Kara observed about humans—they often used body language to express emotions, typically the bottled up ones, rather than verbally expressing them (which Kara, and many psychologists, deemed unhealthy). 

The door swung open and revealed Lena in a navy blue—Kara’s favorite color on the CEO—dress. Her face was neutral, which was Lena for upset and/or stressed, until she saw that it was Kara at the door. Lena’s face visibly lit up and her frown turned into a smile.

“Kara Danvers, as I live and breathe,” Lena laughed. 

“Hey, Lena,” Kara smiled. “It’s not really fair of me to say this, but I’ve missed you.”

Kara’s cheeks would’ve gone red if her blood pumped properly, but they didn’t, so her cheeks remained pale and emotionless. Part of her thanked Rao for the lack of blush, but the other part missed it. The warmth spreading through her face was embarrassing, yet comforting. All feelings of heat were comforting to Kara, probably because they reminded her of Krypton, more specifically it’s red sun. Or maybe it was nothing and Kara missed the feeling of being mundane. Yeah, that was probably it. 

“I’ve missed you, too,” Lena replied as her happy smile turned sad. 

Kara expected bite from the CEO, but it had yet to come. Perhaps, Lena was tired, or maybe she simply didn’t care. No, the brunette cared, it was a foolish thought to think otherwise. Best friends cared for each other, and that’s what the two girls were. 

Best friends. 

Best  _ friends _ … 

“Would you like to get situated before I explain, or do you want to talk before we have lunch?” Kara asked, her smile faltering. 

In all honesty, Kara wasn’t completely sure on what to say, she didn’t know how to get herself out of the situation without telling her the truth, or at least bits of it. She was winging it, despite it being an awful idea. 

“I’m starving, so let’s sit and I’ll eat while you talk,” Lena said, grabbing the bag from Kara’s hand and taking it to the couch. 

The alien nodded in response before following Lena to the couch and plopping down right next to the CEO after Lena was settled. Kara wanted Lena to have her food before she started to talk because of the loud crinkle that would inevitably come from the paper bag with ‘Noonan’s’ printed on the front. 

Kara sighed as Lena grabbed her food from the bag, knowing she’d have to start talking. She was torn because would telling Lena a lie be any better than leaving her in the complete dark? 

“I’m sorry for ghosting you, essentially. It was completely unfair and I am so sorry for it,” the alien began. “It had nothing to do with you, it was all me. I pushed you away for personal reasons, you were a perfect friend.” 

There’s that word again.  _ Friend.  _ Kara swallowed the lump that formed in her throat as soon as she finished speaking. The lump was jealousy and anxiety balled together, meaning it was like glass to swallow. Painful and damaging, in a metaphorical sense, of course. 

Lena took a deep breath, as if she was sucking in the information to process it before she’d spit out her response. It reminded Kara of Kirby, which was a weird thought to have given the situation, but her thoughts had the tendency to race from one subject to the next at the most inconvenient times. 

“I appreciate the apology, darling, it takes a strong woman to admit they’re wrong,” Lena said with a look that Kara read as ‘there’s more, but this is the important part’. “You trust me, right?” 

“With my life, yes,” Kara answered as if it was instinctive. 

“I’m glad you feel that way, but why haven’t you talked to me about your issues? If you trust me, then why not talk to me?” Lena asked, seeming to read her thoughts from her head. 

“I didn’t want to burden you, I guess,” the blonde sighed, being only partially truthful. 

“Darling, your problems will  _ never  _ be a burden,” Lena said with power in her voice, making sure Kara understood she wasn’t lying. “Are you sure that’s all?”

Kara nodded as Lena took a spoonful of soup and slurped it down. 

“So, what’s bothering you?” Lena questioned suddenly. 

“What?”

“Your ‘personal problems’; what are they?” Lena reiterated. “I’d like to help.” 

“Lena, I- it’s nothing. It’s not important, anymore.”

“Hm,” Lena paused to think. “Are you sure you trust me?”

“Of course I do,” Kara answered with furrowed eyebrows and a hint of offense in her voice. 

“Then why won’t you tell me what happened? I only have the intention to help.” 

“I- Lena, I can’t. I’m sorry,” Kara’s voice showed signs of a genuine apology—she was actually sorry. 

“Why?”

“Because I’d get in trouble,” the alien replied truthfully. 

“Fuck that, Kara,” Lena laughed, she was amused. “Who cares if you get in trouble, there’s not much anyone could do.” 

“You’re right, but there’d be a lot of scolding from my sister,” Kara joked with a smile. 

“That’s not  _ too  _ bad,” Lena mirrored the smile Kara had painted on. 

She was right. It wasn’t that bad. It was worth the price of Lena knowing the truth, or part of it, rather than nothing. In that moment, Kara made a decision, and Rao, was it a big one. 

“I’m Supergirl.”


	3. Rewrite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little update :)

Hello! I hope you’re all doing well, I just wanted to let you all know I rewrote the ‘feeding’ scene in the first chapter, so if you wanted to check that out, that’s be great! It does change a few things, but it’s not the _most_ important thing, so if you wanna skip it, that’s fine. It’s not too much longer, but just to summarize, she doesn’t feed on animals in the forest, but rather some random people. But, like I said, not too important and it doesn’t make too much of a difference right now. Have a good and gay rest of your day :)


End file.
